Are You Postponing Your Happiness So You Can Build a Successful Career?

By Nukhba Khan

Are you living a checklist-based life?

I think it was in high school or maybe even earlier, I was handed down this checklist. It's not some physical list that is distributed to everyone. It's a list that is understood and followed by most people. The checklist looks something like this:

☑️Get good grades

☑️Get in a good college

☑️Get a good job .. build wealth

☑️Get married

☑️Have kids

☑️Buy a house

☑️Work harder to save money for kid's college education and retirement

☑️Retire

☑️ … the next thing on the checklist does not have to be spelled out.

Picture with a notebook that says checklist. Life Transformation Coach. Mindset Coach. Confidence Coach. Work-Life Balance

What ends up happening is we become overly obsessed with this checklist, so much so that we start postponing happiness just to checkmark things off this list.

… When I get a good stable job, I will be happy.

… When I get a promotion, I will be happy.

… When I buy a house, I will be happy.

… When I start my own business, I will be happy.

… When I ..., when I …, when I …, when I …

The 'I'll be happy when' syndrome takes over our lives.

And, this 'I'll be happy when' syndrome hits us the worst when it comes to our careers.

Are you guilty of thinking that once I achieve success in my career that pays well, only then I'll be truly happy and live a comfortable life? Of course, life will be great when I can afford loads of vacations, eat at fancy restaurants, buy expensive clothes, or own a posh car.

I sure have been guilty of thinking like that.

Do you also say to yourself, "right now is the time to hustle, to prioritize the career, burn the midnight oil and hold off on enjoying life the way I truly want to"

PUTTING LIFE ON HOLD OR PUTTING YOUR HAPPINESS ON HOLD FOR ‘ANYTHING’ IS A CRIME AGAINST YOURSELF.

Happiness is not something that automatically switches on when you have crossed off things on your checklist. Trust me, the next item on the list will appear in record time.

Happiness is now, not in 3 months or 3 years from now. So feel and live happy now, even when life is busy, chaotic, and less than ideal.

If you are saying but how can I be happy right now, when the big things I want in life have not happened yet?!

Well, let me guide you closer to your happiness.

But first, take a moment to read the following sentence with an open mind. An open mind that is willing to listen. A mind that is ready to ponder over new ideas and concepts. A mind that wants to do whatever it takes to be happy now!

Happiness is a habit; it is not a consequence.

Think about this for a moment.

Sure certain events, purchases, milestones, accomplishments can spark a feeling of happiness or satisfaction, but that happiness fades away sometimes in hours and sometimes in days.

But TRUE INNER-HAPPINESS that everyone is after and you might be after is a habit, a muscle built with practice.

So how do you build this happy muscle?

It's straightforward. I don't know why we have complicated happiness in our minds and put so many conditions on it.

If you have your basic needs met, you have everything you need to be happy.

Additional money, promotions, houses, cars will give you spurts of joy, but your want for more is never going to go away.

The 3 principles you need in your life to start feeling happy now.

1.'WHEN I' AND 'IF' STATEMENTS ARE STEALING YOUR CHANCE TO FEEL HAPPY TODAY

The 'I'll be happy when' condition does nothing but hold us back from living a good life and enjoying this very moment.

You have to realize that your ego is the main culprit behind your "I'll be happy when" statement. It all begins when you compare yourself to others.

When you glance at what other people have and decide that you would be happy if you had the same, you start to fall off the happy ladder.

Of course, you know you shouldn't be comparing yourself to others, but it's not the easiest thing to do. Is it?

Here is what you have to do:

Comparing yourself to others is the surest and fastest way to feeling miserable. So, the best way around this comparisonitis, and what has worked well for me, is to stop comparing and start getting inspired by others. Let it be an inspiration of what you can do, be and achieve.

2. BEING GRATEFUL AND CONTENT WITH WHATEVER YOU HAVE IS CRITICAL IN BUILDING YOUR HAPPINESS MUSCLE

You can absolutely aspire for more and plan for the future but don't put your happiness on hold until you get more or until your ideal future arrives. Gratitude for what you have is like that secret yet simple key to happiness.

Here is what you have to do:

Every morning write down three things you are grateful for. And sit for a few moments to feel how blessed and lucky you are to have these things.

3. TRUE INNER HAPPINESS IS SIMPLE AND NOT COMPLICATED;

Typically true happiness includes three elements:

#1. Helping others and being kind to people

#2. Spending quality time with family and friends

#3. Being part of something bigger than yourself and doing something that gives you meaning and purpose.

Here is what you have to do:

Ensure you are doing '#1' daily

Make at least 3-time slots for '#2' in your weekly calendar

Do a monthly check-in to see how you are doing on ‘#3’ and see how well you contributed to your 'why.'

Suppose you can apply these three principles to your life and do the necessary to take care of yourself and the people around you. In that case, you will be in the practice of feeling happy with what you have. And leave the dependency of constantly aspiring for some future happiness that may or may not exist.

Stop delaying your happiness. Start being happy today. You are not going to regret it.