Feeling stuck in life? Learn how to build a strong mindset to get unstuck

Mindset is Everything. Life Transformation Coach. Work Life Balance. Confidence. Mindset Mentor

Do you get this strong feeling that you are not completely happy and satisfied in your life?

YOU WANT MORE.

YOU WANT TO DO MORE.

Life is not exactly how you want it to be.

Maybe you know what you want it to be, or perhaps you don't.

You want things to be a little different. Or maybe wildly different.

You want to do something about it. You should. You must. But you just don't.

It's like you want that change, but you feel paralyzed. I totally get it. Because without any exaggeration, I felt stuck in life for over 10+ years.

Sometimes I felt I was stuck in my job. A few times, I felt stuck in my relationships. I even felt trapped in the city I lived in. Many times I was stuck in worry, afraid to make decisions or changes that I wanted. Almost every time, I was stuck in my fears. Sometimes I felt stuck in one area of my life, and sometimes it was in different areas.

The bottom line is whether you feel stuck in one area or multiple areas of your life, it is not pleasant.

THE MISTAKE I MADE that resulted in me feeling stuck for so many years was that I made short-term and temporary fixes to stop 'feeling' stuck. I never actually got myself unstuck. I only tackled the feeling and not the issue at hand.

And this mistake is so common.

But suppose you genuinely want to break free and create a life where you feel more satisfied, relaxed, happy, and not stuck. In that case, you need to do a little digging, a little reflection, and some mindset shifting.

You get one life. And it is your responsibility alone to make the most of it. When we get stuck, we cannot just sit and wait for change or external change to happen. We have to get up and figure out how to get ourselves unstuck. And not just do the things that help stop the stuck feeling for a short bit, and that stuck problem creeps back in almost immediately. But rather nip the problem in the bud by getting to the root of the problem.

I will lay out the 5 CRITICAL STEPS you need to take to create a mindset that gets you unstuck and gets you to start living the life that makes you smile and feel proud of.

#nomorestuck

Let's get started!

5 Practical Steps to get yourself unstuck. Life transformation coach, Confidence tips, work life balance, mindset mentor

Step 1: CLARITY

It is common to overgeneralize the cause of what is making you feel stuck in life. For example, our minds scream, "I feel so stuck … in my job or my career or my relationship or in making progress or just generally in life." But feelings are not facts. And your thoughts are not facts.

You need to uncover the facts, i.e., what exactly in your job, relationship, progress, or life is making us feel so stuck.

Because we don't understand the core problem, we feel paralyzed in making changes that will help us get unstuck.

IDENTIFYING THE PROBLEM IS HALF OF THE SOLUTION

You need to start figuring out is why exactly you feel stuck—that is, what is the root of your discontent.

You have to try and thoroughly understand your current 'stuck' reality through your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Find the time to pause and listen to your inner narrative and write it down - every detail that you can gather.

Grab a pen and a journal or a piece of paper and start by answering these questions:

Where and how are you stuck in life?
Why did you get stuck?
What makes you feel stuck?
Is there a specific reason you feel stuck?
What thoughts run in your mind about feeling stuck?
How is the experience of being stuck - what does it feel like? What emotions do you feel?
Are there any significant challenges in your personal and professional life that are exacerbating your stuck feeling? Are you doing anything to overcome these challenges?

You cannot get to a solution till you fully understand what you are dealing with. There really is no shortcut but to get really honest with yourself. Without any judgments, layout what exactly is going on with your life and where the stuckness is coming from. Sometimes you realize that the problem is actually not as big as you think, and then there are times that you do have a genuine hurdle on hand. But knowing the limitation is critical to overcoming it.

Step 2: WHAT'S IN YOUR WAY?

Once you have a clear understanding of what is making you feel trapped in your life and its impact on your life, the next step or question is, why haven't you been able to do anything about it? Or if you have tried to do something - why did it not work?

This will help unravel all the things (made up in your mind) that are holding you back.

For example, some of the reasons are:

I don't know what to do about it.
I don't have the time to figure it out.
I don't have the energy to figure it out.
I don't think there is a solution.
I am waiting for something to change (external factor), and that will fix everything.
I am too lazy to take action.
I am too depressed to do anything.
I am too scared to shake up the status quo.
I have commitments, and I can't change much in my life.

Whatever your reasons are, put them down.

Next, ask yourself … is this a real or a valid reason, or am I making excuses?

(From the list above personally, only the first and last reasons are legit obstacles, and the rest in my viewpoint come across more like excuses)

If you think it’s a real and valid reason (You are Group Valid Reason in step 3), then you have to get a bit creative. We will cover how to do that in step 3.

If you think it's an excuse (You are Group Excuse in step 3), then ask yourself: Are the consequences of staying stuck significant enough to stop making excuses and take responsibility to better your life? Or put it this way, is it time for you to say enough is enough?

Is it time for you to take better control of your life and not let lame excuses keep you feeling stuck in life?

If you answered yes, it's time, then move on to step 3.

If you answered no, it's not time to stop making excuses, then you are not ready to make changes ... yet. You don't have that deep inner desire to make an effort and do what it takes to change things and shift your mindset to get unstuck. I say this with so much love .. work on building the desire and then circle back to step 3. And I do hope I have given you something to think about, and you will reflect and build the courage to do whatever it takes to get unstuck.

Step 3: Shifting Perspective

Okay, now that you know what is getting in your way, an excuse or valid reason, let's build the mindset muscle to overcome both.

GROUP EXCUSES:

Here are few more questions for you to first think about:

What is making excuses costing you?
Is the cost worth it?
What will it take for you to put excuses aside and really figure how to get yourself unstuck?

I believe that believing in yourself is what it takes to make the changes you want in your life. The best way to shift your perspective is to LEARN TO BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.

When you make excuses, it is likely your fear talking in addition to the overly critical inner voice that underestimates your potential.

Two of the best ways to program yourself to believe in yourself are:

Make a list of all the times you have done new things or challenging things, and it was a success. This list is what you need to read repeatedly, and keep telling yourself that I have done it before, I can for sure do it again.
The second thing you need to do is become your own vigilant security guard responsible for monitoring your inner chatter. So when self-doubt creeps in and says I can't, I don't have, I don't know, then your security guard can respectfully escort the negative chatter out of your mind and reframe the negatives.

I can't do that yet, but I will make a plan to make it possible.
I don't know how yet, but I will learn and figure it out.

Change the negative by adding yet, and but.

Group Valid Reason:

When you have valid reasons for being stuck and don't have that many 'obvious' options, you just have to start getting creative. You have to get creative to create opportunities.

You have more options than you know - trust me!

You almost have to become the rebellious child and be like, no, I don't accept the current circumstances. I will put myself first and not be a victim of my circumstances. I am going to fight. ROAR! And I am going to think creatively because I know a perfect solution is out there for me.

Ultimately you have to get creative and answer this crucial question: How can I improve my quality of life in my current life settings? When you start looking for answers with faith that the solution is out there, the opportunities and options will present themselves. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS NOT STOP TILL YOU FIND YOUR ANSWERS.

Step 4: START SMALL

Quite obvious but yet we don’t realize is that the opposite of stuck is movement and action.

Now that you are pumped, you believe in yourself, and you are ready to get creative and do something about your 'stuck' feeling … you have to start by taking small steps. Because honestly, you are coming out of the stuck feeling, and the forces to pull you back in staying stuck are still strong. You have to start by taking a small action to avoid overwhelming yourself. Plus, taking action builds your motivation to do more and keep going. Yup! Motivation does not lead to action. ACTION LEADS TO MOTIVATION.

So think of small steps, baby steps that you can start today to help to get yourself unstuck. Again these are small steps. Also, by all means, you can lay out the complete plan, which may entail a bunch of small steps or a mix of small and big steps. But start small - something that you will actually do.

These small steps will, over time, accumulate and help you achieve your goals and get you unstuck!

So what is that small step that you can start off with? What is that small step that you need to take?

And force yourself to get through your first step.

Celebrate Small and Big Wins. Life Transformation Coach. Confidence. Work-Life Balance. Mindset Mentor

Step 5: CELEBRATE

Celebrating your wins, big or small, is so essential to build momentum.

The natural tendency is to focus on achieving big goals. The problem with that is those big goals are not achieved overnight. So it is crucial to recognize and celebrate small wins because that keeps you motivated and determined to stay on course to achieving the big stuff!

Celebrating small wins pushes us to feel proud and happy, and that triggers you to go further and achieve your next success!

And now that you have mastered the first small step decide on the next small step and master it. And guess what? All these small steps will keep increasing your inspiration, excitement, and commitment to pursue your big goals. They will finally get you unstuck and help you start living a life that just puts a sweet smile on your face.

FINAL THOUGHTS

The last thing I want to touch upon before I end is PURPOSE.

Maybe I should have started with purpose because knowing and defining your why is essential if you want to love life, i.e., not to feel stuck in your life. Your purpose is not your job, your responsibilities, or even your goals. Your purpose is bigger than that.

If you want to be happy and fulfilled in life, you need to define your personal purpose, i.e., why you do what you do. It has to be more than getting paychecks, and it's just a responsibility I have. Knowing and keeping the bigger picture top of mind will help you when life is unglamorous, things get tough in life, and when you start feeling stuck.

Your overarching purpose is EXTREMELY PERSONAL. It stems from being of service to others. Your service might be to your family, society, the company, and the people you are working with, or its service to yourself. Whatever your case may be, it is ultimately how you spread joy to others or yourself, or maybe both?

Take a moment to think about what you deeply care about and how your life aligns with this personal priority. Because if your life is not aligned with your purpose, you will likely feel stuck sooner or later.

Also, defining your purpose or your 'why' can help you get unstuck by giving you direction on what you need to do and what small steps you need to take to be and live on purpose.